Jesus Knows

Written by Kailynn Nelson

Everyone watched in awe as she knelt at Jesus’ feet. This woman, this sinful woman, began to cry. Her tears hit Jesus’ feet and she wiped those tears away with her hair. She kissed His feet and anointed them with oil. As this woman knelt before Jesus, Simon the Pharisee, who had invited Jesus to eat with him, said to himself,
“If this man were a prophet, He would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching Him, for she is a sinner” (Luke 7:39).
Simon was surprised that Jesus, this holy man would let a woman like this near Him. If Jesus really was from God, then, He would know the sins of this woman and He wouldn’t let her touch Him. Because God wouldn’t have anything to do with her, if He knew who she was.
What surprised Simon in this moment is something that also surprises me about God. I’ve wondered this about myself. The more I walk with Jesus, the more I wonder why He still chooses to love me. Over the years I have seen the depths of my sin. God has shone light on parts of my heart that I wish weren’t there. In His light, I see selfishness, fears, and doubts. I see many things that make me feel shame. I have fallen more times than I would like to admit.
I’ve found myself wondering, many times, if God knew what I would be, would He still have chosen me? When I see all that I’m not, I wonder if He regrets the decision to die for me. Is He just holding onto me out of duty or obligation, or does He truly love me? Because, if Jesus truly knew who or what kind of woman I am, because I am a sinner, He wouldn’t let me touch Him. He wouldn’t come anywhere near me.
I understand Simon’s question here in Luke’s Gospel. The Pharisees had this view of God, that He doesn’t care about or love dirty people. They thought if Jesus had truly come from God, He would stay away from sinners, because they were not worthy of Him. If I’m being honest I have believed this lie about God myself. I have believed God’s knowledge of my sin would push Him farther away from me.
Even when I read through the Bible, I see the people that God chooses, and I echo Simon’s thought. If God knew the sins, both past and future, of the people He chooses would He still choose them? After God saves Israel from their slavery in Egypt, they build a golden calf and worship it. If God would have known about this, would He have bothered to save them at all? If He knew what Israel would become, would He have let them stay in Egypt?
Even in the New Testament, I wonder about the choices that God made. The disciples were a bit of a mess. Even though they saw His works and heard His teachings, they still abandoned Jesus right before His crucifixion. Even while they followed Him, they doubted and were often confused. In Matthew 16, Jesus tells Peter that he will be the rock of the church. But only a few chapters later, while Jesus is being tried before His crucifixion, Peter denies any connection with Jesus. If Jesus really was a prophet, if He really was the Son of God, then He would have known who Peter was. If Jesus knew, then why would He decide to build the church on this crumbling rock?
I don’t know where you are with God right now. Maybe, you are seeing what I’ve been seeing. You’re seeing your sin for what it is. You’re seeing how dirty you are, how unworthy you are. And you can’t seem to understand why He would love someone like you. You may feel like any second God will see you for what you are and change His mind. You think to yourself, “If He really was God, then He would know…”
God knows.
He knew from the very beginning. He knew before I did, what kind of woman I would be. He knew I would be weak and timid. He knew the sins that I would find myself in, even after I was saved. He knows your sin and my sin, even better than we do. Jesus knew long before the sinful woman entered Simon’s house who she was and what she had done.
It's a scary thing to think about God knowing you fully. It’s uncomfortable to think that there is nothing in me that God does not know about. But as I read through the Bible and reflect on this knowledge of God, I also find comfort. God is fully aware of my sin and my current and future failures, and He chooses to have compassion on me. He is not surprised by my sin, and so He already has enough grace to cover me. He will not run out of grace because He wasn’t prepared, and He will not withhold grace because He doesn’t love me anymore. God knew about my weakness and He did not let the knowledge of that weakness stop Him from saving me. How amazing does it make God that He knows how messed up we are, and will be, yet He chooses to still love and still save?
You may be like the woman that entered Simon’s house. You may be seeing how sinful you are. You may be overwhelmed with shame. You may be feeling that if Jesus knew…
I hope and pray that wherever you find yourself today you might find some comfort here.
God knows where you are.
He knows what you are.
God is not surprised by your sin.
He knows.
And He has grace ready for you in Jesus Christ.